What are you so afraid of?

This weeks webpoll asks:

What is your is your phobia?
Phobias are defined as feelings of anxiety, panic, or dread, that result from a triggering event or thought. Some phobias are simple and can be overcome with little difficult; others can frequently lead to anxiety attacks or states of panic.

Here are a few that exist:

Daemonophobia - Fear of demons. (do in laws count)
Dementophobia - Fear of insanity. (you should not visit this site then)
Domatophobia - Fear of houses or being in a home. (great for the homeless guy)
Electrophobia - Fear of electricity. (that would be a bitch if you were afraid of the dark too)
Ergophobia - Fear of work. (think I have worked with some of these people)
Eurotophobia - Fear of female genitalia. (and if you are a woman?)
Gerascophobia - Fear of growing old (tough crap)
Hoplophobia - Fear of firearms. (I might be this, if I was at gun point)
Lachanophobia - Fear of vegetables. (I could point some of these people out to you)
Myxophobia - Fear of slime. (that might be could reason to clean)
Nucleomituphobia - Fear of nuclear weapons. (I think maybe this is what I have)
Oneirogmophobia - Fear of wet dreams. (does that lead to the fear of laundry?)
Phobophobia - Fear of phobias. (that's just crazy)
Scoionophobia - Fear of school. (I think my 17 year old is developing this)

Paraphobia - Fear of sexual perversion.


Xerophobia - Fear of dryness. (no comment)

Last week's webpoll asked our visitors 'What's your sign'?
The results are in:

Capricorn (5%) - Capricorns are hardworking, reliable, and dull as hell. They are always on the move, headed to their next delusion of grandeur. They are often good at math which explains why they are such pains in the ass.

Aquarius (10%) - The Aquarius loves a party. Anytime, anywhere is their motto. It is not unlikely that an Aquarius will consider a wake a good place to meet chicks. Aquarians tend to be nostalgic about the 1960s because that was the last time they could be naked in public and get away with it.

Pisces (5%) - Everywhere you go, laughter and comedy ensue. This would be great if you were trying to be funny. You are deeply confused by the idea of sex. As far as you are concerned, if it didn't happen in "The Velveteen Rabbit", it doesn't exist. Piscean women wear long floaty dresses and enormous amounts of unusual silver jewelry.

Aries (5%) - Aries have ramlike eyebrows and smug expressions. They should not be quite so smug because they are constantly clunking themselves in the skull. Cat Stevens' "Hard Headed Woman" was probably an Aries. Aries rarely say one thing and do another. They usually do the wrong thing and don't discuss it. Never point this out to an Aries unless you want your kidneys pulled out through your sinuses.

Taurus (10%) - You are brooding emotion incarnate. One minute you're up, the next you're down, the next you've shot your favorite newscaster in the kneecaps, "just 'cuz.". You're very earthy, which may mean that you don't shower as often as most people

Genimi (5%) - Everyone loves a Gemini because everyone loves a schizophrenic. You like to think that you are a half-and half mixture of Socrates and Michelangelo, but in reality it's more like Prince and Bea Arthur. You are progressive, outgoing, and one of the most popular rides at Cedar Point. However, you can and will negate all of this by the time you're finished reading this sentence.

Cancer (15%) - You like to know what's going on in the lives of everyone in the galaxy. However, you tend not to know what's going on in your own. If you are lucky, your friends will tell you. Cancerians only get dressed because they have to, and their fashion sense can only be described as "erratic."

Leo (5%) - You will grab attention in any way you possibly can. Self-immolation is not out of the question. You like to kiss mirrors a lot. Genghis Khan was a Leo, and so is Barney the Dinosaur.

Virgo (5%) - You are a pain in the ass. You regulate your breathing and color-coordinate the clothes in your closet. No Virgo in history has ever belched. Virgos clean every square inch of everything they own twice daily with a toothbrush.

Libra (15%) - You are oh-so-elegant and tasteful to the point of incurring nausea from loved ones. You are also bipolar as hell and can't make a decision on your own. You usually consult your therapist or TV Guide. Libras are trendy and malleable folks.
Scorpio (5%) - You got into computers early so you could use made-up, bulls**t terminology and get away with it. Most hackers are Scorpios, as are most people who think they're going to find fame on a chat board. You embarrass Libras because you like your coffee straight out of the bag, eaten with a spoon.

Sagittarius (10%) - Sagittarians are born adventurers. They like smashing spiders with their bare hands and trying to walk to the bathroom in the middle of the night with the lights out. They would sooner sustain crippling injury than do anything the easy way. Sagittarians love to entertain their friends, family, and total strangers.

Don't know (0%)

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3 comments:

  1. I had to check 'other' because I don't have a true fear or dread of any of the above. I don't like most of them, but I don't fear or dread them.

    ReplyDelete
  2. We Virgos don't believe in astrology.

    ReplyDelete
  3. As for this phobia... "Oneirogmophobia - Fear of wet dreams"... Hell, I don't fear wet dreams. I welcome them. I love being stuck to my bedsheets in the morning. Feels so good, I giggle and fart all at once. Hey, I'm a friggin' Libra and that sure is true what you say about them being tasteful. Hahahaha. Great, funny post.

    ReplyDelete

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