Why Is My Body Doing That? The Weird Side of Menopause Nobody Warned Us About
Updated: Oct 22
Hot flashes, disappearing words, mysterious aches, and the strange experience of living in a body that suddenly seems to have its own agenda.
There comes a moment in life when you stop, look around, and wonder:
What the hell is happening to my body?
One day, you're feeling pretty good. You're productive, organized, and ready to take on the world.
The next day, you're searching the house for your phone.
While talking on it.
You wake up sweating in the middle of winter. Your favorite jeans fit differently by dinner. Your shoulder hurts because apparently you slept incorrectly.
And somewhere along the way, your body seems to have developed an entirely new set of operating instructions.
Welcome to midlife.
Now, I know menopause isn't exactly a secret. We've all heard about hot flashes.
But what about everything else?
Why does sleep suddenly become complicated? Why can concentrating feel more difficult? And what's happening when your body temperature decides to ignore the thermostat?
I had questions.
So let's investigate.
First, What Exactly Is Happening to Our Hormones?
Menopause is officially reached after 12 consecutive months without a menstrual period, provided there isn't another medical explanation.
The years leading up to it are called perimenopause.
During perimenopause, hormone levels—including estrogen and progesterone—can fluctuate considerably.
Eventually, estrogen levels decline as ovarian function changes.
But here's what makes the experience so unpredictable.
Hormones don't necessarily decline in one smooth, orderly progression.
They fluctuate.
And those changes can influence several systems throughout the body.
Which brings us to some of the more interesting—and occasionally ridiculous—experiences of midlife.
1. Why Am I Sweating When Everyone Else Is Freezing?
Picture this.
You're sitting comfortably in a room.
Everyone else seems perfectly happy.
Then suddenly, your internal temperature feels like someone turned on a furnace.
Your face gets hot.
Your chest gets warm.
And now you're removing layers of clothing like you're performing some sort of emergency striptease.
Welcome to the hot flash.
Hot flashes are associated with changes in the brain's temperature-regulation system during the menopause transition.
Declining estrogen appears to influence neural pathways involved in controlling body temperature.
The result?
Your body can trigger heat-loss responses, including sweating and increased blood flow to the skin, even when the room temperature hasn't changed.
The interesting part: A hot flash isn't necessarily caused by your body actually becoming dangerously hot. It's a response involving your internal temperature-regulation system.
And when these episodes happen at night, they're commonly called night sweats.
Which explains why you can go to bed under a perfectly reasonable blanket and wake up wondering whether someone secretly installed a sauna.
2. Where Did My Brain Go?
Have you ever started telling someone a story and suddenly forgotten the word you needed?
Not a complicated word.
Something simple.
Like refrigerator.
You know exactly what you're talking about.
You can picture it.
You can describe what it does.
But the word itself has apparently left the building.
Some women report difficulties with concentration, memory, and word retrieval during the menopause transition.
Researchers are investigating how hormonal changes, sleep disturbances, mood, and other factors contribute to these experiences.
The important thing to understand is that occasional forgetfulness doesn't automatically mean something serious is wrong.
But persistent, worsening, or concerning cognitive changes deserve medical attention rather than being dismissed as menopause.
Because while forgetting why you entered the kitchen can be funny, changes that interfere with everyday functioning shouldn't simply be ignored.
3. Why Am I Awake at 3:17 Every Morning?
Remember when sleeping meant closing your eyes and waking up the next morning?
Wasn't that lovely?
Now you might fall asleep perfectly well, only to wake up several hours later.
Maybe you're hot.
Maybe you're uncomfortable.
Maybe your brain has decided this is the ideal moment to revisit an embarrassing conversation from 1987.
Sleep disturbances are common during the menopause transition.
Night sweats can interrupt sleep, but they aren't the only possible explanation.
Stress, mood changes, sleep apnea, medications, and other health conditions can also contribute.
And poor sleep can make everything else feel worse.
Concentration.
Energy.
Patience.
Mood.
Even how you experience pain.
The takeaway? Don't assume every sleep problem is simply something you have to tolerate because you're getting older.
There are treatments and strategies that can help, depending on what's causing the problem.
4. Why Does My Body Hurt When I Haven't Done Anything?
Here's one I find particularly annoying.
You wake up.
Your shoulder hurts.
Why?
Apparently, because you slept.
Some women experience increased joint discomfort or musculoskeletal symptoms around menopause.
Estrogen plays roles in several tissues, including bone, muscle, and connective tissue, although the relationship between hormonal changes and joint pain is complex.
And not every ache is caused by menopause.
Arthritis, injuries, changes in activity, sleep problems, and other medical conditions can contribute.
As a personal trainer, I believe maintaining strength and mobility is especially important as we age.
Resistance training helps preserve muscle and supports bone health.
But there's also a difference between challenging your body and ignoring pain.
If something hurts persistently, it's worth understanding why.
Your body doesn't hand out bonus points for suffering through it.
5. Why Do My Jeans Fit Differently?
Here's another mystery.
You haven't dramatically changed your eating habits.
You're still moving around.
Yet your favorite jeans seem to have developed an attitude.
Body composition often changes with age, and the menopause transition can contribute to changes in fat distribution.
Some women notice more fat accumulating around the abdomen.
At the same time, aging-related changes in muscle mass and physical activity can affect energy needs.
But menopause doesn't mean weight gain is inevitable.
Nor does it mean every change on the scale is caused by hormones.
Genetics, activity, sleep, medications, health conditions, and eating patterns all matter.
This is one reason I prefer focusing on strength, health, and sustainable habits rather than chasing the body we had at 25.
I have no interest in spending the rest of my life trying to squeeze into jeans that have clearly decided our relationship is over.
I'd rather feel good in the body I'm living in now.
6. Why Does My Energy Have Absolutely No Consistency?
Some days, you're ready to reorganize the entire house.
Other days, unloading the dishwasher feels like a major accomplishment.
Energy fluctuations can have many causes.
Disrupted sleep, stress, changes in physical activity, mood symptoms, and medical conditions can all play a role.
Hormonal changes may contribute indirectly, particularly when they interfere with sleep.
But persistent fatigue shouldn't automatically be blamed on menopause.
Thyroid disorders, anemia, sleep disorders, and other conditions can cause similar symptoms.
Sometimes the most useful thing you can do is stop guessing and have a conversation with your healthcare professional.
Because feeling exhausted all the time isn't something you should simply accept as your new personality.
7. And Why Didn't Anyone Explain All This?
This might be my biggest question.
We spend years learning about puberty.
We discuss pregnancy.
We talk about childbirth.
But menopause?
For a long time, the conversation seemed to begin and end with hot flashes.
Meanwhile, women were experiencing changes in sleep, sexual health, concentration, mood, and physical comfort without always understanding what might be contributing.
Thankfully, menopause education and awareness have become more visible.
And there are evidence-based treatments available for many symptoms.
Menopausal hormone therapy is one option for some women, particularly for bothersome hot flashes and night sweats. Nonhormonal treatments are also available.
The right approach depends on a person's symptoms, medical history, preferences, and individual risks.
What matters is knowing you have options.
You don't have to buy every supplement advertised on social media.
And you don't have to suffer in silence.
So, What Can We Actually Do?
Here's where my fitness background comes into the conversation.
I can't stop time.
I can't promise that a particular workout will eliminate hot flashes.
And I certainly can't guarantee that eating more broccoli will prevent you from forgetting why you walked into the kitchen.
But there are practical ways to support your health during midlife.
Regular physical activity, including resistance training, can help maintain muscle, strength, and bone health.
Adequate nutrition supports overall health and recovery.
Consistent sleep habits may help, although sleep problems sometimes require specific treatment.
And when symptoms interfere with your quality of life, medical evaluation can help identify appropriate options.
Most importantly, pay attention to what's happening in your body without assuming every change is normal or inevitable.
Getting older doesn't mean giving up on feeling good.
It means learning what your body needs now.
Sometimes You Just Have to Laugh
I don't find every part of menopause funny.
Being exhausted isn't funny.
Struggling with symptoms that interfere with everyday life isn't funny.
And feeling uncomfortable in your own body can be genuinely frustrating.
But sometimes?
You have to appreciate the absurdity.
Like standing in front of the refrigerator wondering why you opened it.
Or being the only person in a room who needs a fan.
Or discovering that sleeping in the wrong position now apparently requires three days of recovery.
Humor doesn't solve the problem.
But it can make the experience feel a little less isolating.
And personally, I refuse to spend the next chapter of my life being miserable about every change that comes along.
I've got too many things I still want to do.
Too many places to explore.
Too many questions to investigate.
And apparently, an entirely new body to get acquainted with.
Midlife isn't the end of being interesting.
If anything, it's giving us a whole new collection of things to be curious about.
Even if we occasionally forget what we were curious about in the first place.
LOOK CLOSER. THERE'S MORE.
This article was inspired by Episode 1 of The Amber Dea Lux Show, where I explore the realities of midlife, hormones, wellness, and the wonderfully imperfect experience of being human.
Explore more fascinating discoveries about health, anatomy, aging, and the science of being human in Body & Desire.
Health note: This article is for educational purposes and isn't a substitute for personalized medical advice. Symptoms vary, and new, persistent, or concerning changes should be discussed with a qualified healthcare professional.
Amber's Recommendation: Handheld Portable Turbo Fan with Ice Cooler, Speed (1-199) Rechargeable Personal Fan
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