Are we messed up about sex? You put a group of people together and tell them to have sexual experiences with each other, but each person has been informed, trained, and influenced, all in different ways, about this subject we claim to know so much about.
Where do our sexual attitudes come from? We are influenced by everyday people, our media, our loved ones, and the people who raised us, so how much control and opinions are of our own?
In 1938, Alfred Kinsey began gathering case histories of sexual behavior. In 1940, Kinsey and his staff collected over 18,000 interviews and published Sexual Behavior in the Human Male in 1948 and Sexual Behavior in the Human Female in 1953. With all this research, people started to learn about sexual behavior and where they stood among the masses. But, introducing ongoing exploration of our sexuality throughout the times of change, have we strayed from asking the questions and assuming that what we were taught or experienced is just that of our norm? Do we stay comfortable with what we know and leave it at that?
Sex is a large part of our lives; when you think about it, does it not control how we think, feel, act and portray ourselves to others? Our sex, as in gender, has separated us through eras. Our sexual preferences have us turning from one situation to another. Our sexual attitudes on a personal level influence how we deal with each experience. We could group our attitudes into like minds and bodies, bend a little and try the new thing, and very well accept those who wish not to journey with us to the unknown.
We all seem to be doing a lot about nothing, talking very little about what we want to share. Instead, we take our little attitudes and secret desires and sneak them into the corners of our lives, hoping someone will understand, make sense of and play along. It is not common to discuss fantasies with your mate, friends, or co-workers; although done, how detailed and truthful are they? Have you asked your partner questions about sex? Is there a whole discussion? And if this happens, is this a comfortable thing to share?
As free as we are to express ourselves, do we define ourselves sexually without judgment? Society has us dancing through fire as it is, so keep your clothes on and your mind clean, and don't tell us what you are doing behind closed doors unless you are on Oprah and there is a scandal involved. In this day and time, is there the shush factor? Are we as open-minded as we think we are? Or do we have more to judge than in times past?
We live with rules, laws, conditions, and personal limits. With this massive subject, look into your sexual attitude and how it reflects and affects who you are. Keep yourself as accurate and true to yourself as possible, but allow the changes, curiosity, and enjoyment to bring you to new levels of your life without letting go of your identity. Your sexual attitudes should never go stale and become a healthy place within your life.
Sometimes with relationships in your life, the influence of one's attitudes can be good or bad. So open your mind and don't judge those whose attitude differs; remember how the journey has differed from your own.
